Speaking of this matter, even now it's still hazy and unclear. I myself don't understand how it became like this. Originally, I was a very rational person, quite rational. Now, alas, everything has changed.
My friend's wife is named Lanlan, a woman you'd find beautiful at first glance, with an impeccable figure. We've watched them from acquaintance to marriage, and I've helped out a lot! I'm someone who values friends deeply, so everyone likes to ask me to handle things. This friend of mine is a driver for his boss, so he's often not home, and he's quite a playboy, frequently fooling around with girls outside. His wife knows and has argued many times, but it's useless. My friend simply stopped going home and stayed at the company.
And I repeated living a stable life every day, and I was quite satisfied with this lifestyle. But later, my family often criticized me, and I started to get annoyed with them. I played outside every day, but I was still well-behaved. However, after being criticized too much, I thought I might as well really go out and have some fun, so I wouldn't be blamed by my family for no reason. It was under these circumstances that something I never expected happened.
That day, I went to Wuguang to buy things. Just as I pointed at a piece of clothing and was about to ask the price, unexpectedly a voice said: 'It's you! Buying clothes?' Oh, Lanlan was here working for someone selling clothes. Turns out we hadn't been in contact for a long time, so I also smiled and greeted her, asking each other about our respective family situations.
When talking about friends, she showed a very dissatisfied expression. Also, her friend only returned home a few times a month, and the friend's parents were notoriously strict. I guessed she wasn't having an easy time either, so I smiled and said, 'Isn't that just life?' This time, two acquaintances running into each other were both somewhat excited; after all, it had been a long time, and she was just annoyed at having no familiar person to vent her frustrations to, so I chatted with her for quite a while.
At that moment, someone came to buy clothes, so I said I was leaving. She suddenly said, "When are you treating us to a meal?" This puzzled me. Although we often ate and drank together before, the two of us had never done so alone, as my friends knew my style. Perhaps I was also very annoyed by family issues then, so I immediately said, "Sure, let's connect then." Afterwards, I didn't think much of it.
Two days later, I argued with my family again. In a fit of anger, I went out wanting to clear my mind, but ended up wandering around not knowing where to go. After all, friends have their own things to do, and others might not be in the mood to listen to my troubles! So, I suddenly thought of Lan Lan and tried to find her. I saw her sitting there in a daze; it seemed business wasn't very good.
Seeing me, she immediately smiled and said, 'Are you bored? You're wandering the streets too?' I said, 'Not at all, I came specifically to invite you for a late-night snack.' She smiled and said, 'Willing to treat?' I was momentarily at a loss for words. She might have been afraid I'd leave, given how annoyed she was, so she quickly added, 'Let's chat here; I get off at nine.' We then chatted about all sorts of things.
After work, the two of us went to Jiqing Street and casually found a late-night snack stall, ordered two dishes, and started chatting. Who knew we would end up talking about family matters again; the more we talked, the more irritated I got, so I said: 「Drink or not? When I’m upset, I want to drink.」 She said: 「Up to you.」 Back when we were together, we were all heavy drinkers, so we ordered a bottle of Zhijiang Daqu. I asked her whether she wanted some, and maybe because she was annoyed too, she drank a little. Later, the two of us talked on and on, feeling more and more that life was too short, and without realizing it we finished the whole bottle while chatting and drinking, both of us getting somewhat drunk.
I said, 'It's past one, let's settle the bill and head back.' I was worried her mother-in-law would scold her if it was too late, so she agreed. Since she lived far away and the road was very dark, she asked me to walk her home. On the way, we didn't say another word. Maybe because we were irritable, the alcohol felt especially intoxicating that night, and my head was dizzy. I could see she had the same expression.
As we neared the door, wanting to avoid suspicion, I turned to leave. Unexpectedly, Lanlan suddenly said, 'I'm feeling very dizzy. Let's just sit here on the landing for a bit, otherwise they'll scold me if they see me like this when I go back.' I couldn't very well refuse, so I agreed. The landing was a staircase originally modified from someone's home. We sat there in a daze. Because the space was narrow, we sat very close. I caught a whiff of a very subtle orchid-like scent; it wasn't perfume at all but a completely natural body fragrance. Smelling that scent, combined with the effects of the alcohol which were growing stronger, I suddenly felt a bit unable to control myself. My breathing suddenly accelerated. I tried to control it, but the more I tried, the worse it became. I was starting to pant a little.
She glanced at me, just as I was looking at her, and quickly lowered her head. I think she was also feeling the effects of the alcohol at that moment; the way she looked down was incredibly beautiful, I can hardly describe it. Then, I realized I was terribly impulsive; without thinking, I suddenly held her shoulders and kissed her face. I don't know where my reason went. She might have been startled by my action, her whole body trembling, but perhaps she had also been expecting it, as she didn't resist or react much, just let me kiss her.
I could no longer control myself, so I kept kissing her face and ears, my hands also roaming incessantly. I heard her breathing becoming more and more rapid, and she was panting too. When I tried to undo the buttons of her blouse, she suddenly grabbed my hand and said, 'No, what if someone comes?' I was desperate at the time. I said I didn't care about anything, but she absolutely refused, afraid of waking the neighbors. I could only beg her in a very low voice to agree. In truth, having gone so long without affection, she also wanted it. So she said, 'Not here, unless there's a place.' I said, 'Where's good?' To my surprise, she actually said to go to her room. I was shocked because her in-laws lived right next door. She said they were definitely asleep this late, and if we went in quietly, they wouldn't know. What if someone passed by here?
Sigh~ Women can be bolder than men when they want it, throwing caution to the wind. At that time, I was desperately wanting it, so I gathered my courage and quietly followed her into her room. She even deliberately coughed, went to the bathroom to wash her face, pretending it was just a normal return home. I hid by the door of her room, waiting for her. I was really nervous and excited, feeling like I waited forever. She turned off the bathroom light and came into the room—I later found out she had taken a shower. As soon as she closed the bedroom door, I couldn't wait any longer and hugged her waist from behind, kissing her ear forcefully, my hand slipping under her shirt hem to grab her breast. Wow! So round and firm! Instantly, my little brother stood straight up, pressing against her plump buttocks.
As I kissed her, her breathing grew heavy, so I kissed downward, unbuttoning her top to find a black bra—she seemed a rather conservative woman. I forcefully pulled it open, and a pair of very fair, firm breasts bounced into view, making me dizzy. I immediately switched to holding her breasts with both hands, my mouth sucking hard on her nipples as she panted heavily, letting me play with her.
I couldn't take it anymore and desperately wanted to see her most private place. I hurriedly pulled off her pants and yanked down her black panties. The furry valley suddenly appeared before my eyes—so beautiful. The most secretive place, one that shouldn't be touched by others, was right in front of me and at my mercy. I was so excited my whole body trembled slightly. I gently touched it with my hand; it was already soaked. I inserted my fingers and moved them back and forth a few times, making it even wetter.
I couldn't resist bringing my mouth closer, kissing her desperately, my tongue probing fiercely. Her whole body trembled. Maybe it had been a long time since she'd had this. I could feel her intense desire. She suddenly lowered her head and whispered, 'Carry me to bed, come quickly.' I eagerly carried her to the bed, hurriedly stripped off my clothes, heavily pressed onto her body, parted her legs, and thrust my hard, big cock right in.
She let out a 'Hmph,' then immediately realized she was at her own home. So she tightly closed her mouth, not letting me kiss her, afraid to make a sound. I was so excited I had no technique, just knew to fuck her hard and nonstop. It was incredibly thrilling. The more I fucked, the more into it I got, the harder and heavier my thrusts became. She also desperately raised her hips to meet the wild thrusts of my big cock, her mouth tightly shut.
Seeing Lanlan like this excited me even more, so I fucked her harder. She quickly pulled a pillow from the side and placed it under her butt. I knew she was afraid the heavy thrusting would bang against the bed and make noise, but this only made her pussy spread wider and allowed me to go deeper. My cock felt incredibly good fucking her.
We used this one position and fucked for over half an hour straight. She had two consecutive orgasms, and suddenly I couldn't hold back anymore. With a series of urgent tremors, I shot a load and collapsed onto Lanlan. She still wrapped her legs tightly around my waist, her mouth continuously kissing mine. I knew she was very satisfied and still wanted more, after all, her husband hadn't fucked her for a long time, but after I came, I sobered up. I whispered into her ear, 'I need to leave quickly, don't get caught. If that happens, everything will be over.' She reluctantly clung to me a few more times before letting go.
I quickly slipped out. Walking on the street, a cool breeze blew by, and I suddenly sobered up. Thinking about what just happened, I felt a bit scared afterward. What if someone had caught me on the spot? That would have been terrible... But the feeling just now was so incredibly good, like heaven. I hummed the song 'Tearing the Night' as I walked toward the late-night snack stall, wanting to drink a bit more to calm my nerves.
At the late-night snack stall, I ordered another bottle of beer, drinking slowly by myself.
The night wind was a bit cool, but the alcohol still kept my body warm. My mind was filled with the images from earlier: her biting her lip, not daring to make a sound, the pillow under her waist, and how tightly her legs wrapped around me when I came inside. Even though I knew I shouldn't, I couldn't suppress the lingering sensation.
The next day, I didn't contact her.
Not on the third day either.
At noon on the fourth day, the phone vibrated.
It was her number.
"Busy?"
I replied: 'No.'
"This afternoon there’s no one in the shop. If you’re free... you can come by and sit for a while."
I looked at that message and hesitated for a long time. In the end, I replied with an 'Okay.'
Around two in the afternoon, I arrived at her shop. It was a clothing store near Wuguang, and business was already sluggish; at this hour there were even fewer people. When she saw me, there was a flash of panic in her eyes, but she quickly regained her composure, only her face slightly reddened.
"Just looking around." she said softly, as if speaking to any possible guest.
I nodded and wandered around the shop for a bit. Honestly, I wasn't really seeing anything. After a while, she came over to me and whispered very quietly:
"There's a small storage room in the back; the door can be locked."
I followed her inside. The warehouse wasn't large, filled with cardboard boxes and clothing racks. She locked the door behind her, turned to look at me, her lips moving slightly but saying nothing.
I kissed him first.
This time was more urgent than that night. Her response was also more direct; she proactively wrapped her arms around my neck, pressing her body tightly against mine. I slipped my hand under her clothes, grasping those already familiar breasts, and she immediately let out a soft nasal sound.
"Gently... there's surveillance outside." she said breathlessly.
"Then keep your voice down."
I turned her around, had her place her hands on a cardboard box, and pulled down her pants from behind. Her black panties were already damp in a small spot. I didn't engage in much foreplay and entered her directly. She let out an 'ah' and immediately bit the back of her hand.
In the warehouse there was only the slight sound of bodies colliding, and her stifled breathing. I reached around to the front with one hand to fondle her breasts, while the other supported her waist, thrusting in again and again. Her inner walls were hot and tight, contracting continuously with each movement.
After about twenty minutes, she suddenly tensed up, her thighs trembling. I knew she had come, but I didn’t stop; instead, I sped up. She bit the back of her hand, her shoulders rising and falling violently, until I also released everything inside her.
Afterward she leaned against the cardboard box, gasping, and put her pants on herself, but she still didn't dare look at me.
“Next time... change to a different place.” She said softly, “This place is too dangerous.”
From that day on, we began meeting regularly.
When she got off work early, she would message me to wait at a nearby hourly-rate hotel. The rooms were always randomly chosen—cheap, simple, but enough to accommodate two people urgently needing release. Each time, she was more proactive than the last. Sometimes she would kiss me as soon as she entered; other times, she would have me perform oral on her first, not allowing me to enter until she had climaxed once.
Once she came very late, and after entering, she directly pushed me onto the bed and straddled me. With her hands braced on my chest, she moved up and down herself, hair disheveled, breathing rapid, but she kept looking into my eyes the whole time.
"Don’t cum inside... it’s the dangerous period today." She suddenly said.
I nodded, but at the last moment, I still couldn't pull out completely. She felt it, just lightly bit her lip, and didn't blame me.
Later, we learned to be more careful. During the safe period, I would finish inside; during the risky period, I would finish on her lower abdomen or in her mouth. She gradually became willing to give me oral sex, and her technique went from awkward to practiced. Sometimes after climaxing she would lie limply on top of me, tracing circles on my back with her fingers, her voice muffled:
"He hasn’t come home in three months already."
“I know.”
“Actually, I quite hate him.”
“I know.”
We rarely talked about the future, and rarely about right or wrong. We just used our bodies to fill the voids worn by life whenever we needed each other.
A month later, a friend suddenly came home to stay for a few days.
For those few days, she didn’t contact me at all. I knew she was avoiding suspicion, yet I still stared at my phone at night. The day after my friend left, a text came again:
"He’s the same as ever. Are you free tonight?"
I replied, "Yes."
That night she arrived very early; after entering, we almost tore each other's clothes off. We did it twice, once on the bed, once in the shower. When she climaxed, she bit my shoulder so hard it left a mark.
Afterward she leaned against my chest and suddenly said:
"Sometimes I feel like I'm really cheap."
I didn't speak, just tightened my arms.
"I clearly know this is wrong, but I still want to see you." She continued, "Once I see you, I only want you to fuck me."
"Then stop thinking so much."
She was silent for a long time, finally softly 'mm-hmm'ed.
The story continues like this.
No promises, no outcomes, only scalding night after scalding night, carefully tucked into the crevices of life. And we all knew—
As long as he still doesn’t come home often, as long as I still need this outlet, this relationship will not truly end. It’s just that some warmth, once tasted, can never be returned to.
Day by day, my meetings with Lan Lan became a kind of unspoken rhythm.
Her life over there remained unchanged. Her friend would occasionally come back to stay for a day or two, like a fleeting visitor, leaving behind a few meaningless words and taking away the smell of alcohol. She never brought up those nights on her own. It was only the day after he left that a text message would appear on my phone, right on time.
“Tonight, okay?”
Every time I see these four words, I clearly know what I should do.
The hourly hotel room was changed to a more discreet location. Sometimes it was the small storage room behind the warehouse at her shop, sometimes a budget hotel on the outskirts of town with few guests. The room was always simple: a bed, a mirror, a door that could be locked from inside. Enough for us to vent everything suppressed during the day, completely in the darkness.
Once she came unusually early. At four in the afternoon, business was slow at the shop, so she closed early. When I arrived, she was already sitting on the edge of the bed, still wearing her work high heels, but her stockings were off.
"Don't rush today," she said, her voice softer than usual, "I want to... take it slower."
I walked over, crouched down, and helped her take off her high heels one by one. Her calves were wrapped in flesh-colored stockings, and the arch of her foot was particularly clear under the light. I didn't go up immediately; instead, I held her ankle and slowly pressed my thumb over the sole of her foot. She trembled slightly but didn't pull away.
"Would you have treated her like this before...?" she suddenly asked.
"Who?"
"Your wife."
I was silent for a few seconds before saying: 'Rarely. She doesn't like it.'
Lan Lan said nothing more. She extended her other foot as well, letting me help her slowly roll down her stockings inch by inch. The stockings slid from her thighs to her knees, then to her ankles, and when they finally left her skin completely, her toes curled slightly. I lowered my head and kissed the back of her foot, and she drew in a breath.
That day, we did it really slowly.
I started from her toes, working my way up. My tongue swept over the inside of her ankles, her calves, the soft flesh behind her knees. She lay on the bed, one arm covering her eyes, her breathing growing increasingly ragged. By the time I finally kissed her inner thighs, she was already very wet. I wasn't in a hurry to enter, instead carefully tending to her with my lips and tongue. Her fingers tangled in my hair, pressing lightly then hard, as if wanting to pull me closer, yet also wanting to push me away.
When the climax hit, her whole body arched, her thighs clamping around my head, letting out a long, hoarse moan. I didn't stop, continuing to lick gently until she tremblingly pushed me away.
“Enough... come in.”
I braced myself above her, slowly entering. This time she didn't bite her lip, but looked directly into my eyes. Inside was hot and tight, and with each deep thrust, I could feel her actively meeting me. We held this position for a long time, neither of us speeding up. The room was filled only with the subtle wet sounds of our bodies joining and increasingly heavy breathing.
When I was about to come, I asked her: 'Is it okay?'
She nodded, wrapping her legs tighter.
Afterward she lay on her side with her back to me. I held her from behind, my palm covering her lower abdomen. Only after a long while did she speak:
“Sometimes I feel like I’m doing something really stupid.”
“Regret?”
“No.” She paused. “It’s just... knowing clearly that this won’t have an ending. But I still can’t stop.”
I didn't respond. Some words change their flavor once spoken. There were never any promises between us, and never any future. There was only the body warmth of this moment, and the outlet we both needed.
Half a month later, a friend suddenly called me.
“Bro, are you free tonight? Come out for a couple of drinks.”
I held my phone, my heart skipping a beat. It had been a long time since I had seen him alone. After hesitating for a few seconds, I still agreed.
We met at the usual place in the evening. He was still the same as always, smoking, drinking, talking about things at the company, occasionally mixing in stories about women he knew from outside. I listened, nodding occasionally, but my mind was filled with images of Lanlan pinned beneath me. The alcohol made him talkative, and he suddenly patted my shoulder:
"How have you been lately? Is everything okay at home?"
“Not bad.”
"My Lanlan..." He took a gulp of alcohol, his tone somewhat irritated, "she’s getting more and more sullen. No matter what I ask, she always says nothing’s wrong, but just by looking at her face you can tell something’s on her mind. Women are such a pain."
I stared at the wine in my glass and said nothing.
“Forget it, let's not talk about her.” He waved his hand. “Let's drink ourselves drunk tonight and not go home until we're not sober.”
I didn't drink much that night, but I still saw him home. When we reached the entrance of his residential complex, he was already a bit unsteady on his feet. I helped him upstairs, my heart pounding fast. When the door opened, Lanlan was standing in the living room. Seeing me, her whole body visibly stiffened.
"You... how did you come?" Her voice was a bit dry.
“Take him back.” I handed my friend to her and took a step back myself, “I'll stop here.”
My friend was already leaning on the sofa, waving drowsily. Lanlan saw me to the door, and we looked at each other for a few seconds in the shadows of the porch. Her lips moved, and finally she said very softly:
“Be careful on your way back.”
I nodded, turned, and went downstairs. Behind me came the sound of the door closing, soft, yet like something being locked again.
The next few days, she didn't send any messages.
I knew she was avoiding suspicion and that I shouldn't initiate contact. But by the fifth night, my phone still lit up.
"He's still going to stay for a few more days. Let's leave it at that for now."
I replied with a "Good."
Three days later, the friend finally left. The text message arrived almost within half an hour after he went out:
“Tonight. Same old place.”
I arrived earlier than her. Only the bedside lamp was on in the room. When she entered, she brought in the cold air from outside; without even taking off her coat, she kissed me. This time was more urgent than any other time. Clothes fell to the floor, shoes were kicked aside, and we almost tore at each other as we fell onto the bed.
She straddled me, holding me as she lowered herself down. Her inner walls immediately wrapped tightly around me, hot and wet. She braced her hands on my chest and began moving up and down, her hair falling down, covering half her face. I reached out to brush it aside, but she grabbed my wrist and pressed it against her breast.
“Harder……today don’t hold back.”
I sat up, thrusting upwards from below. She let out a suppressed cry but didn't remind me to be quiet again. The room's soundproofing was average, but she seemed beyond caring. I turned her over, entered from behind, and reached my hand around to rub her clit. She buried her face in the pillow, but her hips actively pushed back.
After doing it once, she didn’t let me pull out. While we were still connected, she turned her head and said in a hoarse after-sex voice:
“One more time.”
The second time, we tried many positions. Once, she knelt by the bed while I stood on the floor and took her from behind. Her hands braced against the bed edge, and she would tremble slightly each time I thrust deepest. I looked down at where I entered her, watching the white, cloudy mixture being pushed out at our joining point, and suddenly felt an indescribable satisfaction.
After the second time finishing, both were completely exhausted. She lay on top of me, her fingers unconsciously tracing circles on my chest. After a long time, she said:
"When he left today, he asked me if there was someone else."
My body stiffened.
“I denied it.” she went on. “He didn’t seem to really doubt it either. He just asked casually.”
“Are you scared?”
“A little.” She looked up at me. “But what I’m even more afraid of is... if one day it really ends, I don’t know whether I can go back to how I was before.”
I didn't give her an answer. Because I didn't know myself.
During that time, we met more frequently. Sometimes three times a week, sometimes two days in a row. She began to relax more in front of me, would actively request positions she was previously too shy to mention, would bite my ear after climax and say things she'd never normally say. I gradually became familiar with every reaction of her body—where she was most sensitive, what rhythm could bring her to climax fastest, how she would clench when I came inside.
Once she was on her period, and we only did it externally. She used her mouth on me, and her technique was already very skilled. After finishing, she leaned against my chest and suddenly asked:
"Have you ever thought that if, back then... we had not met in this way, things might have been different?"
I looked at the ceiling and took a long time to answer:
“I thought about it. But it’s meaningless to say these things now.”
She gave an 'Mm' and didn't press further.
Winter came quickly. The city started to get colder, and the clothes she wore became thicker and thicker. Once in a warehouse, she was wearing a turtleneck sweater, and when I held her from behind, the sweater was pushed up above her chest. The cold air made her skin break out in goosebumps, but inside her body it was burning hot. We did it quickly because someone could come at any moment. Afterward, when she was straightening her clothes, her fingers were trembling a little.
“Sometimes I feel like I’m stealing something.” she said quietly.
"Steal what?"
"Stealing warmth that doesn’t belong to oneself."
I helped her pull her sweater straight and didn't say anything.
A month later, a friend suddenly said he was being transferred to a branch office in another city, for at least half a year. The news was told to me by Lan Lan. That night when she came over, she carried an indescribable mood. We did it very fiercely, as if we were trying to confirm something once and for all. After it was over, she lay beside me and stared at the ceiling for a long time.
“Half a year.” She repeated it. “He’s leaving for half a year.”
"What do you plan to do?"
She turned to look at me, her eyes bright in the dim light:
"Continue. At least... until he comes back."
I nodded.
From that day on, our meetings were no longer so sneaky. She even sent me messages during the day, asking whether I was free that afternoon. Once, we spent from noon until evening in the storage room of her shop. There were occasional footsteps passing by outside the door, and she bit my shoulder to keep herself from making a sound. The tension of possibly being discovered at any moment only made each climax even more intense.
I started getting used to this kind of life.
During the day, doing what one should do; at night or during some gap in the afternoon, surrendering oneself to another woman's body. Returning home and facing family as usual, listening to their mundane chatter. No one knew I had another secret outside. And Lanlan also slowly transformed her resentment towards marriage bit by bit into dependence on this relationship.
One night, after we finished, she suddenly looked at me very seriously:
“What if one day he really changes and stops playing around outside—what should I do?”
I was silent for a long time before saying:
“We’ll see when the time comes.”
She smiled, a hint of bitterness in her smile.
"You’re always like this. You never give a definite answer."
"Because I can’t give you that."
She wasn't angry, just buried her face in the crook of my neck, her voice muffled:
“Then let’s leave it at that for now. At least right now, I still need you.”
I tightened my arms, holding her tighter.
The city lights outside the window are ablaze, while we hide in this cramped room, exchanging with our bodies what neither of us can obtain elsewhere. No one mentions the future, and no one promises forever. Only night after night, carefully filling the gaps in life.
And we all know—
As long as he still isn’t around much, as long as I still need this outlet, this relationship will continue.
Some warmth, once it enters the bones, can never be drawn out.
The story is still moving forward.
It’s just that the direction was already impossible for anyone to see clearly.
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